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Nobody ever said that criminals are the most intelligent folks in the world. In-court antics by some people have led Jeff Elder to make numerous arrests. Every day is quite an experience for the bailiff in Missouri.

"People come in to have a trial on their silly little traffic tickets while they have outstanding warrants on other [criminal] charges. Guess who gets to arrest them? I'm fairly sure that I have more arrests than the whole police department combined."

He's seen all kinds of behavior in the court.

"I can't forget about those fools who come into court drunk or under the influence of drugs, carrying drugs or having weapons on them," says Elder. "My primary job is to protect the judge and to carry out any and all orders from the judge -- including orders to arrest people for contempt. And I do it."

Elder has an associate's degree in criminal justice and pre-service certificates in the administration of justice and in criminal justice. While in college, Elder worked as an intern with the Kansas City Police Department.

"I really didn't choose this profession. I was selected by a district court judge, who happened to be my criminal law professor, to come and intern or apprentice in his courtroom. I also started working as a bailiff for a friend of my father in a municipal court."

Elder has no average week. Municipal trials started at 7 a.m. and sometimes lasted until the wee hours of the morning. Now in district court, Elder is on duty whenever the judge is on the bench.

Ruth Gould's most memorable case involved the eviction of a family from their home about 20 years ago. Gould went to the house to serve papers on the family. She found an elderly woman and her three small grandchildren. The house was filthy, there was no food, the grandmother spoke no English and Gould couldn't find the parents.

After getting them some food, Gould took the four to a nearby shelter. She doesn't know -- and she doesn't want to know -- if the parents were ever found. The thought of the children still haunts the veteran bailiff to this day.

J.P. Bailey has been studying the law since he was eight. He now operates a firm which usually has between 200 and 300 open cases.

"I've always enjoyed that gray area of the law that floats between being a sheriff and a lawyer. I also have used my right to be self-educated -- like Abe Lincoln did years ago -- to become what I am today, which is basically a civil constable."

Bailey's favorite cases are those in which he gets to represent his client before the Supreme Court.

Having to serve divorce papers to an 86-year-old man dying of cancer was among the most difficult jobs for bailiff John Lodge. Lodge tried to be as cordial as possible -- the man didn't know of the pending breakup of his marriage.

Most of Lodge's work is for lawyers who need documents served for pending legal actions.

Tim Mooney has always been interested in the court system. He had relatives and friends who were attorneys and judges. While Mooney was never interested in law school or in being an attorney, he found the next best thing.

Mooney is the bailiff to the administrative judge in the domestic relations division of the Cuyahoga County court in Ohio. Working in the civil division allows Mooney to avoid many of the gorier aspects of criminal court. But the job still has its moments.

"There was a case in our court involving a divorce where the state of health of the woman in the matter was an issue. The woman's ex-husband was privy to some confidential information regarding her prognosis. The domestic relations division definitely exposed me to some ironies of life. Some are unusual and offbeat."

Cows presented the biggest challenge for Jim Marlow, owner of a bailiff services company. He had to seize 40 dairy cows from a farmer who had not paid for them. After some persuasion, prodding and trucking, the four-legged producers of milk were returned to their owner. All in a day's work for a bailiff.

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